CM-U: You've talked on other occasions about the experience of going to the slaughterhouse…
Mel Chin: Um-hum.
CM-U: …to collect the blood. And the experience of the separation of yourself from…
Mel Chin: Uh-huh.
CM-U: In the process of collecting the blood, you separated
yourself naturally from the horror of what was happening. Or maybe from
the artistic process, being involved with the horror of what was
happening.
Mel Chin: Yes. Well, yeah.
CM-U: And how that had an impact on your work.
Mel Chin: Well, the psychic impact there was actually, I was
conscious I was making art. But I – it was more not so much the
slaughterhouse, but it was how you can transform your rationality and
your repulsion and all this into a whole 'nother venue. And it felt
very much – I began to project [sounds like] as if I were at, in war, or
just doing violence…
CM-U: Um-hum.
Mel Chin: …'cause how, to get the job done, I had to be like the
person who was throwing these living animals that had their throats
slashed at me, and be very cruel and very nonchalant, maybe. Not even
cruel. It was not even – I think that would put too much emotional
impact on it. I had to be nothing, other than just like him, doing a
job. And yet I was shaken because, as I said, I'm doing this for art.
But then I realized, under the right circumstances, or wrong
circumstances, you – a human being is able, compelled to do most
everything that they stand against as well. And, let's say that I might
have known this intellectually, but to be in a situation while making a
piece of art where it brings it forward to the surface so much, that
was disturbing. So that, yes, I could possibly kill – or be a killer,
or do this, and I would not even think about what it means. Because I
have this other thing riding over it.
CM-U: Hmm.
Mel Chin: In this case, could it be patriotism to go take another…
CM-U: Loyalty.
Mel Chin: Loyalty. What __________ [word inaudible]? Well, all
these things come into play. And then I realized that there was no
feeling at all. Perhaps that was the scariest thing, or the most
psychically disturbing in the process of collecting this material. What
I had to do is, what happened was, I was collecting the blood, which
was pooling about an inch thick on the floor with a pile of animals
dying around me. It was just trying to collect the blood as it
coagulated so quickly of course, you know. The head killer, who was not
very far, in a very tight and hot room, cut a goat and just laughed and
threw a goat all the way across – a living animal. All the way across
the room, and it fell, and he was shooting for the basket.
CM-U: So you had the basket there? You were…
Mel Chin: Yeah, it was right…
CM-U: …just collecting…
Mel Chin: …it was right – it was all clean and, you know, nicely
woven; and I was trying to paint some blood on. He just picked up the
animal and just threw it in there. And you hear the ribs of the thing
crack. And he laughed. And this is somebody that you don't mess with, I
had a feeling. Especially as he's hacking at these animals' throats
and everything.
Mel Chin: But I looked at the animal, and it was just – that
image on the wall (points) – that is what I was trying to describe.
How memory can be affected two ways. That those – the panels I call
biographic diptychs – show the fallen column…
CM-U: Um-hum.
Mel Chin: …and the goat in the basket. To me there are two ways
of thinking about how you remember – the accident of the column dropping
and falling and cracking and paring [sounds like], it was very clear
and precise and clean, in a way. It's just an object that cracks, and
you repair. And using the porcelain is about the fragility of it. With
the drawing of the goat in the basket, however, that's a memory that is
very foggy and very distant, yet it's more like it's a memory that
smolders – it has a longer effect, a more nightmarish – or it can be
peaceful, it can be not – it can be something entirely different.
Mel Chin: However, the goat did die right in the basket. And it
bled. And then I said, "Well, to get out of here, I've gotta do it."
And something just changed. I just started grabbing the animal from
him, and was spraying the blood over the piece. So as the animal would
die, I would drop it down and get another one.
CM-U: Hmm.
Mel Chin: And that's how it was done very quickly. And then I
gathered more blood and took it home, and mixed it up with the coffee
and the mud. And there were some glues and things used. Like Elmer's
or whatever. Just as another binder. I tried to – I was using the
blood as a binder as well.
CM-U: __________ [phrase inaudible]
Mel Chin: Yeah. Well, we put it out in my parents' patio. They
were very tolerant. They thought that something very serious was
happening here when I brought in this bloody mess. And it was very –
goat blood smell, which is very pungent-like, and it needed to dry. It
was very wet. And we put fans right in its mouth, and shut the door,
and went in and let it be. It was outdoors. Then the next day I did – I
added more of the mud and the coffee and the blood that was left over,
and just wiped it all over the surface.